Posts tagged personal

Personal Goals:


  • If you are indeed treated unfairly, standing up for yourself without feeling guilty is appropriate.
  • A person’s opinion of you will not define you.
  • Organization.
  • More cooking at home and less fast food.
  • No pop unless it is a) Friday or b) a special occasion
  • Beach and pool, go there.  Not many people can go “on vacation” by walking down the street or driving 7 miles.
  • Let it go.  Let it go.  Let it goooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.  By this I don’t mean more Frozen.  I mean let go of past frustrations and move beyond them.
  • Exercise at least 3 times a week.  (Bonus points for more).
  • Artistic outlets.

9/21 Progress:

1.  Haven’t needed to.

2. Not needed.

3. Better, but not the best.

4.  Eh…. did better this past week than the previous 3 weeks.

5. Horrible the last week, but excellent the other 3 weeks.  Couldn’t find unflavored sparkling water ANYWHERE.  But I did yesterday, so I should be back on track.

6. Has been too rainy.

7. Excellent!

8. Not at all.  (Beginning of the year is so hard with rainy day dismissals and home visits!)

9.  Only twice in a month.

Why my Joe Schmoe is awesome

Joe Schmoe has flaws, just like the rest of us. He has a hard time understanding people’s experiences / reactions that are different than his own.  I’ve tried for years to get him to understand that my general anxiety disorder is different than times he has felt anxious because of work.  He tried to understand, but his reactions to when I felt pretty much paralyzed because of my anxiety showed he didn’t get it.  This summer, I explained what happens when the anxiety hits.  That I want to hide under the covers.  I can’t stop thinking about it.  I lose sleep. It interferes with things I enjoy.  One Christmas was ruined because I was worried students’ parents would be mad that I got them Christmas presents.  That the anxiety is usually caused or triggered by mundane things.  Things that I intellectually know are not big deals.  Things that I know what to do or say, but am really freaked out/scared/worried about doing.  That I have to imagine putting those worries in a box, locking it, putting on the top shelf and locking the door and then giving the keys to someone I trust.   And I have to remind myself of that vision often.  

I explained this because of my anxiety over dealing with my homeowners insurance with the flood, arguing over warranties, trying to get my account right with the internet company that didn’t put my account on vacation as asked, and trying to negotiate a better deal for my satellite tv.  That those things all at once, had me wanting to run for the covers.   No amount of “listening to him” do it would help for future circumstances because I already knew the basic things to say.  That didn’t make the anxiety go away.  It didn’t make my belief that such representatives tend to listen to men better than women go away.  It didn’t make my worries about money and being screwed over disappear.  He worked on the things I was stressed about, but I still didn’t think he got it completely.

With my dish washer problem, I was getting pretty frustrated.  I e-mailed my Joe Schmoe about some Labor Day ads on appliances I saw in the paper and asked his advice about which way to go.  Before I could open the e-mail which said I should go into Lowe’s, see if they had any open boxed dish washers, and negotiate an even lower price, he called to offer to call the store himself and negotiate because he knew how much it upset me.  I was grateful, and he agreed, but there were no such dish washers.  He gave me the best advice he could and I went into the store to pick a model myself.

I called him afterwards to tell him what I picked.  He told me he was proud of me.  Just now he texted me to tell me he just told my grandma how proud of me he was — because of the dish washer.

Now. I don’t need him to go overboard about being proud of me doing simple things that I should be doing.  But I think he’s starting to get it.

Pictures from the week.  My school had an hour sight seeing cruise donated to our staff.  We saw some beautiful mansions from the water, but its a weird situation when the students who attend the school you work at are the poorest in the county.  Seems a lot worse when you find out most people that own these mansions are there less than 2 weeks a year.  Also, spent the day on Wednesday with my podmate at the pool for lunch and drinks poolside.  We call it “going on vacation.”  I’m not a member at the club, but I am lucky that some of my neighbors write me passes occasionally. I also made DELICIOUS turkey meatballs from scratch using panko bread crumbs, carrots, and zucchini.  I thought they would be awful and need a lot of sauce or salt, but they didn’t.

This is a photograph from my college and the window where the guy is straddling the windowsill is my old dorm room.  I am trying to find the original spot its posted on the school website to give it proper credit.

This is a photograph from my college and the window where the guy is straddling the windowsill is my old dorm room.  I am trying to find the original spot its posted on the school website to give it proper credit.

Still fighting with insurance to repay me for repairs from flood in February.  Going around the ringer with paper work crud.  Maytag won’t honor 12 yr warranty on a/c with broken air compressor thingie that should have been insured until 2020.   But, new owner.  Damn you, insure your product not the owner.

I have no monies.  

Also, bonus money from school grade going up seems to be going to mostly taxes b/c it is taxed at a higher rate.

Where is the part where things go right?

laurissawilson replied to your post “My grandmother is getting pretty up their in age.  Health-wise, she…”

So make sure it tastes perfect. Dont worry about calories, forget you diet and really put your heart and soul into this pulled pork. Don’t beat yourself up for tasting it. Heck, eat a whole pound! Its food, with loved ones. Enjoy it 100%

I appreciate the sentiment Lauri, I do.  And normally, I’d join right on that wagon.  However, the whole point of Phase 1 of this diet (which only lasts 2 weeks) is to reset your body’s blood sugar and cravings for sugar.  This is especially important for me because I have Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome which makes me feel hungry all the time AND makes me crave sugar because I am very resistant to insulin.  Tomorrow will be day 6, and making it this far has been hard for me as far as temptations go.  I know myself and if I give in once it almost turns into, “Oh what the heck I’ll eat 5 more and start over tomorrow.”  And, I really don’t want to do 6 extra days of Phase 1.   So, I’m counting myself out on this and I plan on making it again while I’m home during Phase 2.   Phase 2 I’m going to allow myself one cheat day a week with the choice of 2 small cheats or one medium/slightly large one.  So on that day, I’ll have the pulled pork, but without the bread I can’t have.

I really appreciate everyone’s support and cheering me on throughout this. Means more than I thought it would since when my family cheers me on I just feel fat.

My grandmother is getting pretty up their in age.  Health-wise, she has survived heart disease and breast cancer.  However, she seems to be getting sick and hospitalized every 2-3 months now.  Family stress combined with her health has really eliminated her appetite.

Joe Schmoe can’t think of anything more delicious to eat than my pulled pork.  So he asked me to make a whole thing of it for my grandma to eat tomorrow and then freeze into individual servings because it reheats so well.

Obviously, I am glad to do it.  Anything for my grandma.  But my parents sure are making this dieting thing rough on me with eating foods in front of me that I can’t have and asking me to cook things I can’t eat.

Lucky for mom, she’ll get to be my taste tester tomorrow since I usually taste as I cook to determine if it a needs a little more of this or a little more of that.

Contracts and teenagers

My mom told me today that she had learned from a tv show (or speaker or parenting book, not sure) that when making agreements with teenagers you should have it written down and signed, like a contract.

Apparently, she tried this with me.  I refused because a) I was angry at the time and b) I told her I didn’t sign contracts without having my lawyer look over them.   She said, then fine then you don’t get — whatever it was that I wanted.  So, I took the pen and signed it.

I signed it with the name Daffy Duck.

Pretty sure I got that idea from tv.

Dearest Tumblr, I've never come to you with a greater need before. My friend needs a lung and heart transplant, and the medical expenses are in no way entirely covered by insurance.

I have known Sal Pulito since I was in the third grade.  His sister, Aurora, has been best friends with my sister since they were in Kindergarten.  Sal was born with Pulmonary Atresia, which means that there is a lack of blood flow to his lungs.  It has become a life and death situation for him.  Sal is one of the most kind-hearted people I have ever met.  He is probably the only one that understand the difficulty of dealing with the antics of “Salt and Pepper” as our sisters called themselves.  

His insurance covers a very small percentage of the medical costs, and the deductable that he has to reach first is huge.  Obviously, this explains my passion for the recent Health Care legislation, as I know it has been for many people on tumblr.   But this story is so personal to me, I wish I could paint you a better picture of the Pulito family, but I will do my best below.

Sal’s parents are first generation immigrants from Italy.  They speak Italian and English.  Sal’s dad loves Elvis, and admittedly, looked a little bit like him when we were all younger.   Sal is a phenomenal key board player, and has been in a band that performs at local restaurants and parties.  In recent years, due to his medical condition Sal has had to move back home with his parents.  Sal is a year older than me, and I can only imagine the freedom in addition to the good health Sal is hoping to have with this surgery.   Sal’s older sister Jackie has a spirited daughter who is 12, and Sal is such a good uncle to her.  Nina is the oldest, and for all you Chi-town people I know, she lives in Chicago with her husband and is book sniffer like many of us.   Aurora has a little boy who Sal entertains with his music, and Vinny is adorable when he dances along.   I have to say Sal’s mother is probably my favorite in the family.  Her Italian Flag cookies and homemade spaghetti sauce have been a favorite in our household.  Mrs. Pulito is one of the warmest people you could ever meet, and seems to take you into the family as soon as she meets you.  She wants the best for everyone, and is always there with a hug and a kiss.  

I can only imagine the financial hardship Sal’s condition has added up to over the years.  But, what is stuck in the back of my throat is imagining this family without Sal.   It is my every hope and prayer that all goes well for them.  It would mean a lot to me if you could make a donation, even $1 donations help.  I know money is tight for many, so reblogs are very much appreciated as well.  

Please click the link above to visit his donation page. The Donate Now button is at the top of the screen.